Men Hurt Too!!

I'm dedicating this blog to my Husband and the men that endure the emotional pain from miscarriage.

I think as hard it is for any woman to go through a miscarriage I actually feel sorry for their partners who seem to be sidelined or are never offered as much support as women are. Going through our recent miscarriage I seen for the first time at how much it also affected my Husband. He was my absolute pillar of strength over the first few days and looked after me so much but once I was over the worst it was then when it seemed to set in with him. He looked lost and you could see the pain and sadness in his eyes even though he didn't really say much.

In general I think men are not big talkers of how they feel and it's not an easy subject to bring up in a male circle wether that be at work or a group of friends which adds more to the already overwhelming sadness. Men too have to grieve, it's a big decision that a loving couple make to have a baby and whilst it always looks like the men get the 'easy' part they help create these wonderful little miracles and when they hear those words "I'm pregnant" they start in their own way to prepare for their arrival. But sadly when miscarriage happens their world comes crashing down too. Watching my Husband struggle to cope with the loss was hard to see and I openly encouraged him to talk, it didn't matter who to but he needed to be able to voice his hurt for him to deal with.

I tried a little research to see what was out there for male support and there doesn't seem to be as much. Us women have forums on well known sites and we are given leaflets and get support from the doctors. Some men I asked (including my husband) felt there was little support/advice offered to them and not many would know where to go to. It would be nice to see a male only forum so that they can log on and talk (anonymously if wanted) to other men who have been through similar experiences. There needs to be more of a male network to help them cope and overcome their own grieving.



Nikki.W





Ps:
If anyone knows of any sites/forums please feel free to add a comment and share any links.